Back to School: Kindergarten Style

First Day of School-Kindergarten

Back to school. Kindergarten style. I’m not gonna lie, I was that mom. Ya know, the one who stoically dropped her kids off on the first day of school, leaving the class quickly as not to cramp their style but cried the whole drive home. I’ve said this a thousand times in the last few days, but I CANNOT wrap my mind around the fact that my babies are old enough to go to all day-everyday, real elementary school. It was just yesterday yadda, yadda, yadda…not going to bore you with all that, but this is nuts to me. The end of an era.

Do you guys remember buying school supplies? That was one of my favorite things about school. I would get everything home and lay it out in my bedroom, organize it and put it into my school bag. Esprit bags, anyone? I actually never owned one, but wanted one sooooo bad! The girls and I did our school supply shopping last week and it’s safe to say they’re as into it as I was. Wasn’t expecting to have to buy shoes for PE though…whatever happened to going barefoot if you didn’t have the right shoes? I’m sure someone got athlete’s foot and almost died and so the end of bare feet. Kidding. Though Mr. B, arguably the best gym teacher ever, would be appalled.  

School Year Must Haves!

The final thing on our back to school shopping list was the restocking of my Young Living essential oils. I’ve been a total EO slacker this summer but am back on track now that the school year is in full swing. I swear my kids stayed as healthy as they did last school year because of our family’s essential oil use. Thieves is seriously our life saver. I’m adding RC to my order for respiratory crud that inevitably goes around (can help clear out coughs and congestion) and Breathe Again (helpful with congestion too) this month. My go-tos on the girls’ to avoid any bedtime woes are lavender and peace and calming and you better believe they’re also on the list. A well-rested child is a happy child and I’m all for a little bit of happy around here!

In spite of all the tears yesterday and the few tears today, I’m so extremely proud of my babies and am thrilled to be a part of this new adventure they’re on. Can’t believe my kids are in kindergarten!

Colorado and De-stressed

No stress here.

Before I get started, forgive me if I repeat anything from yesterday's post today because I wrote "Stressed" such a long time ago I don't have a clue what I actually said. Ooops.

My last post was about stress and right now I'm feeling anything but.  I've been in Colorado at the 'rents' house (did anyone else read Seventeen...if not, I'm REALLY sorry about that reference. It's bad). Anyway, we've been here for two weeks and I am in full blown Colorado summer mode. Man, I love June in this state! We've been doing everything Colorado, especially Boulder, since my parents are still here. Pearl St., hiking at Chataqua, Scott Carpenter Park, Boulder Creek, Moe's, Efrain's, boat rides at the res, the list goes on and on. Will was able to come out for the first week and only worked ONE day...major victory around here...so we were able to get some much needed family time in. He's since gone home and the girls and I have been solo. A little weird at first, I missed him a lot, but now I'm in the swing of it and we're having a blast.



"Izzie Park." We bring an Izzie every time we
go. Don't even know the park's real name.

In other news, the house STILL has not sold which was the source of much of my stress and what inspired this trip to Colorado in the first place. I couldn't handle another showing, keeping a house clean-like perfect clean-with kids and a dog is near impossible. So we decided to jump ship and fly west. 
I think our house is finally priced right, our first realtor was not doing us any favors in that department. Our first realtor wasn't really doing us any favors actually. In fact, it got pretty ugly there for a while. Now we've got the right realtor, the right price and hopefully the right buyer is writing their offer now! Hey, a little positive thinking never hurt anybody! This will all shake out soon. Wishing I had a crystal ball because I'd love to know what's going to happen here. Not worrying about it anymore though and couldn't be happier than to be spending some time in CO so it's aaalllll good.





Soph at Sunflower Farm in Longmont.

Overall, things are turning up. Not sure how many of you follow me on FB or we are still in touch but a few months ago I found out that I not only owed $3800 for a semester of grad. school that I didn't attend but I'd also received all "F"s for those classes, that I again, never attended. I'd registered for classes prior to finding out about the move to FL and failed to officially withdraw from the university. I accept responsibility for the mistake, but it truly was on oversight. While I'll never get the money back...lesson learned, and an expensive one at that...I was able to appeal the grades and was notified last week that my "F"s were reversed and will no longer count toward my GPA. All of a sudden transferring into UCF to finish my master's is looking possible again. Holler!

Needless to say, the stress level around here is way down. I've got some other REALLY exciting news that I'll share soon (NO, I'M NOT PREGNANT). I'm still in that giddy, nervous stage, but the ball is rolling and I couldn't be happier. Can't wait to tell you all about it so check back in!

Stressed

So, I wrote this a month ago, but never posted because the version of internet explorer I have apparently is no longer compatible with blogger, further adding to my stress. Posting now even though a lot has happened...and I guess a lot is still the same...since. Enjoy.


I'm feeling stressed. I'm feeling anxious. And, well, it kinda sucks! This whole selling a house thing in the traditional way is hard. We were so lucky when we left CO as our house went under contract before even listing it. My brother is a realtor and one of his coworkers had buyers, they looked at it and that was that. It was SO easy!

Our current house has been on the market a little over three weeks now and nothing. Lots of positive feedback about the décor which at first, I have to admit, flattered me. Now, not so much. Décor doesn't come with the house, people!!!  I'm not confident in our choice of realtor either. Actually just got done sending the oh-so-uncomfortable email which outlined our concerns about her ability to get our house sold. Never fun.

It's also sinking in that the neighborhood we'd like to buy is so competitive that sellers laugh at offers with contingencies. Which is fine, I don't want to get into the situation where we'd be carrying two mortgages anyway. But, this increases the urgency to get this place SOLD! Not to mention, keeping the house clean with two small children is next to impossible. I take that back, it's totally possible, we're doing it, but not without some tantrums and meltdowns along the way (and I'm not just talking the kids here!). I feel like Annette Benning in American Beauty when she was manically vacuuming before the open house.

To add insult to injury our pipes backed up the other day and the downstairs bathroom flooded. Why do those things only happen after hours???!!! It didn't end up being that big of a deal. I definitely got some grays and Will has less hair than before but we were cleaned up for showings the next day.

Have I ever told you about the artichoke hearts I LOVE from Costco? They're in this oily, seasoned marinade that is SO good. I know, doesn't seem relevant, but stick with me. I was taking the girls to the park after school yesterday and for the first time in a long time, dared to make food in my own house. If you've had a home on the market I know you can identify with this...do I mess up the kitchen and save the $20 to go out to lunch or just go out?? Anyway, I'm grabbing the bread from the fridge and in the process knocked the jar of artichokes out which then shattered on the floor below. Out came the oily goodness all over the fridge, all over the floor and all over my feet. Awesome. I didn't have plans for the next 30 minutes, but I'd rather have done nothing than clean that mess up. Still finding glass shards everywhere.

I guess the moral of this story is that I'm stressed. I just wish our house would sell and sell FAST. So, please, send me some selling vibes! We need it.

Moving. Again.

Pool

All the pictures are hung, furniture arranged and we are officially settled. It's taken nine months, but man, this feels like home. So why not put the house on the market?!!!?? Crazy, I know, but that's what we're doing. Trust me, I don't fully understand why we're doing this either. I love our house, it really is beautiful, but it's come to our attention that there are some issues.

Biggest problem is that we don't have a yard. I thought this would be a compromise we could make given the swimming pool. That was BEFORE I learned it's way too cold to swim in the winter. Thank you, Mr. Realtor, for telling us that when we went back and forth a thousand times and ultimately decided, eh, no big deal, we'll just swim year round.

This has proven to be a problem for the dog too. Actually, not the dog, but rather the dog's mom who is SO SICK of taking said dog on walks when she needs to do her thang! I just need a fenced yard so that I can throw both my kids and dog outside. I think we may be going from one extreme to the other on this one, because now I want a REALLY big yard. Like a half acre. Picture me on one of those riding lawn mowers...that would be awesome!



Kitchen-a bit more stark than normal for showings.

Financially this sounds crazy, but after running the numbers we're not making a bad decision here. First, there's been a little bit of appreciation in our area over the last year which will contribute to paying the realtors' commissions. Plus, I'm looking at it as though we moved to FL and rented for a year to figure out the lay of the land. Rent is expensive and offers no tax benefits what-so-ever so I don't regret having bought right out of the gate. The only thing I'm out is my time, which was A LOT, given my love for interior design. But that's fun for me so I'm not worried about it one bit.

Fingers crossed we sell our home quickly because this whole having the house ready for showings with two small kids and a dog sucks! Bye bye, Stone Cross Cir. Thanks for treating us so well. Hope you all like this little photo gallery of the house. I'm really proud of it. Enjoy!



Stairs near front entry

Front Hall/Entry

Family Room

Girls' Playroom



Master Bedroom

Guest Bedroom

Girls' Bedroom

Weight Loss Trio Non-update Update

A little less than a month ago I posted about the weight loss trio of peppermint, lemon and grapefruit oils and, sadly, the only update I've got for you is that I have no update. I was diligent the first couple of days and then forgot. And forgot again. And, well, then forgot again. Crazy is the new normal around here and so this fell by the wayside. Which is fine by me. Given my non-update update, there isn't too much more to say! Over and out.

Weight Loss Trio

So, I’m trying something new. I’m really hesitant to share this with anyone, let alone EVERYONE, but I’m doing it anyway. My weight is something I’d rather not talk about so here goes nothin’. A few days ago, I started on what we in the essential oils world call the “weight loss trio.” It’s a combination of peppermint, lemon and grapefruit ingested each day. Now before I go any further, I need to SHOUT out that it is NOT safe to ingest all oils and that the oils I’m using are specific to Young Living. Please (really, please) don’t do this with essential oils purchased at your local health food store. Thank you.  I’ve avoided trying this as long as possible because I firmly believe that we should be accepting of our bodies no matter their shape and size. I believe that what your body looks like on the outside in no way changes the value of the person on the inside. That being said, I still want to lose a few pounds.

 

I’m not one to follow the scale too closely, and I take into consideration that I’ve had twins (like two babies in my belly at the same time), I’m type 1 diabetic, I have a ton of scar tissue build up on my stomach because of the amount of insulin injections I’ve taken, etc., etc. I guess the point I’m trying to make here is that I’m not looking to be in next year’s Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition.  I’m looking for my jeans to fit a little bit looser. I’m looking to feel my best both physically and mentally.

I’m not going to bore you too much with the whole “it’s a lifestyle” thing, but know that I do believe this. I know that diets don’t work. I know that in order for any changes to stick around, there HAS to be a shift in the way one lives their life. Just for the record, I exercise and I eat in moderation. I get the recommended servings of fruit and veggies every day and I also indulge in birthday cake. There are two HUGE sheet cakes in my fridge from the girls’ birthday last weekend which is why cake came to mind almost immediately. Anyway, I think that’s all I have to say about that. We all know there has to be a lifestyle change for long-term results with weight loss whether we want to admit it or not.

 

Moving right along. My biggest fear about trying this is that it isn’t going to work. That it won’t do anything and I will be sitting here having shared this with you all and have nothing to show for it. For whatever reason (I’m seriously not sure why as of now) I’m sharing anyway. I’ve watched it work for many so maybe that’s why I’m putting it all out there today. I don’t know.  I’ll keep you all posted on my progress and if anyone would like to join me on this journey, I welcome your company! Let’s get it done!

Dear Body

This was written by a friend and SO worth the repost. It's wisdom I wish I'd had much earlier in my life. Happy to have it now though. Thank you, Mariah, for letting me share.

Dear Body,

Thank you for being so good to me. For taking care of me, and helping me to function and being strong when I need it most. We've been through a lot together so far; pain, doubt, surprises, and unexpected changes. But all the while, you've been everything I've ever asked of you. You are beautiful. Not because you are the way the world wants you to be, but because you are unique to me and nothing less. You carry scars of battle, motherhood, time, and my occasional lag in upkeep. You've been so patient and steadfast, and unwaveringly loyal, and I love you. I love you so much. Thank you.

-Mariah Secrest Thomas

Broke into Someone's Car the Other Day, or Tried to Anyway

A couple of months ago when this happened I was driving a black Honda Pilot. Total mom car and there are lots of them out there. Ran into Home Depot to grab a couple of things, paid and the girls and I headed out to the parking lot.

We walked up to our car, I started looking for the keys. This is never easy as my purse is more like a duffel bag and a messy one at that. Finally find the keys and push the unlock button several times. By now the girls are getting impatient and start doing what any kid does in this situation: kicking the tires, drawing pictures in the dirt caked on the doors and incessantly pulling the door handle in effort to get the damn thing open. I mean OVER and OVER and OVER again. I finally deem the key battery dead and proceed to jam my keys in the driver's side lock. That's weird, it doesn't fit right. So what do I do? Try again. And again. Yup, one more time. I know what you're thinking; apple didn't fall too far from the tree. It isn't until now that I actually look inside the car.  It's. Not. My. Car.

As a single woman I probably would have been able to duck out of this without anyone noticing. Sadly, the girls and I are nothing short of a circus sideshow and I'm pretty sure every last person in that parking lot knew EXACTLY what was going on. Likely long before we did. Fortunately, I don't beat myself up over these things. The girls and I just laughed really, really hard as we did the walk of shame to the black Honda Pilot two rows over.

Holy Crap...My Kids are Almost 5!!!

Taken just a couple weeks ago.

I know, I know kids get older, time goes by soooooo fast. But seriously, MY kids are getting older and MY time is going by soooooo fast! This Saturday the girls will be five. Like just months away from kindergarten, losing teeth, dating, driving, graduating. I may be getting a little bit carried away but for some reason I kinda always pictured a perpetual state of "little kidness." Scientific term, no joke. I knew they wouldn't be babies forever (AND THANK GOD FOR THAT!!!!) but I never really imagined the part where they turned into independent, self-sufficient five year olds. As everyone says, they truly do grow up so fast.

I did just get back from a vacation sans children, which has been known to cause post trip infatuation. For example, Ava spilled her milk, not once, but TWICE at dinner the night I got home and I laughed both times. Laughed. Any mom will agree that one spilled milk is annoying, but tolerable, though two spilled milks at one sitting, no less, is enough to drive you insane. Having said that and assessing the weight of post trip infatuation, in the last week I have fallen in love with my kids all over again. And the beautiful thing is that this keeps happening.
 

Ava's first photo. 3/22/09

Sophie's first photo. 3/22/09

I remember wandering through Target pushing my double stroller with babies that could barely hold their own heads. Random passerby's would say things like, "it gets so much better." I didn't believe them because in that moment it was as good as I thought it could possibly get. I was already in heaven. You know what though, they were right. Each year gets SO much better. I fall more and more in love with my girls and I can honestly say that the last five years have been the best five of my life. I'll draw this to an end before I get too sappy, just one final thought. If each year thus far has been so much better than the last, and history is the best predictor of the future, I expect that I have many more fabulous years ahead. I am so incredibly lucky to have my little girls and cannot wait to see what our future together holds. 

What a difference five years can make (Ava, L, Sophie, R.)

 

 

 

 

Here's the Truth (with Pictures to Prove it)!

I just got off the phone with my dear friend who is losing her mind.  Not because she is mentally unstable, quite the opposite really, her head is screwed on tightly to those shoulders. But because she has three kids, works (a lot) and is battling with the fact that in order to keep all the balls from dropping, somthing's gotta give. I so get this, I am right there with ya!

So, here's the truth: SOMETHING DOES HAVE TO GIVE. And for me, in this moment, that something is my house. It is trashed, you guys. Like morning after a rager, trashed. But instead of beer bottles and solo cups, it's littered with toys, dishes and dirty clothes. For whatever reason, I'm feeling especially strong today and not worrying about what "they" might think. Who are "they" anyway? So, without further ado, the proof:

That's my kitchen. Yup.

Those, there, dirty dishes...and LOTS of them.

Oh, yeah, that's my living room. Kinda regretting my pillow obsession right about now, as pillows in my house seem to prefer the floor to the couch.

 

Now that is my suitcase. Still nicely PACKED from our trip to Mexico. We've been back for five days.

 

And, finally, the piece de resistance: the girls' room. No explanation necessary.

 

 

I'm not doing this to air my "dirty laundry" so to speak, but rather to shatter the impression that all things must be perfect. Balls drop. Today, I'm embracing the drop and in so doing, hopefully, some of you moms out there can do the same. Enjoy!

Return from Paradise

I know, I say this all the time, but FOR REAL I want to blog more. I want to do this regularly. For one, I love to write. It’s always been cathartic for me and I rarely do it anymore. For two, recently moved, like FAR from friends and family, and I want a way (other than Facebook) to keep everyone abreast to what’s going on with me and mine. I love fb, but no one in my immediate family is on it. So here we go.

Most exciting news as of late, just took a fabulous trip to Riviera Maya, Mexico. Stayed at the Grand Velas resort and it did not disappoint. Every year, assuming my hubbie meets certain sales goals, we get to go on a wonderful, company funded (even better, right?!?!?) vacation. Thank you, hubbie’s company, THANK YOU!!! Think Aruba, Puerto Rico, Bahamas. Anyway, this has been the most beautiful one to date.  

I'm terrible about taking pictures, just don't have time for that when I'm having so much fun! Here's what I did take though. These are of/from my patio. I'm guessing here, but I'd say it was at least 400sq feet. Beautiful.

 

All in all, awesome trip. Changing gears now that I'm back at home. That's all for now!



Essential Oils-For All That Have Asked

Okay, I’m apologizing in advance because this is going to be a long one. I have received a TON of interest in the Young Living oils that I’ve been posting about for the last couple of months on Facebook. The essential oils really have helped my family and me in a lot of different ways (I’ll share more about that in just a sec). I’ve been reluctant to share too much about my oil use as they seem a little “out there.” I know I’m from Boulder and all, but anyone who knows me will agree that I’m NOT a hippie! I do believe in western medicine and, frankly, would be dead without it…hello diabetes! That being said, I want to live a cleaner, healthier life and the oils have been a step in the right direction.

So before you read any further, here is my disclaimer:

I am a distributor of these oils. Phew (or as Ava would say, Pueff)…it’s out. Not sure I should throw that out there now because all of a sudden it seems like I’m trying to sell you on the oils. Here’s the deal, I’m not. I’m not trying to sell you anything, I’m simply telling my story for the MANY of you who have asked. So keep reading, I promise there is no sales pitch! My goal with this is to simply pay for the oils I use each month. I love them and use them, so why not??!!??!!

Anyway, here is my story. About nine months ago I was trying to juggle grad. school, raising babies (well toddlers, I guess) and a husband who was traveling a lot for work. Most days by about 2:00 I was feeling completely overwhelmed, stressed and anxious. I was struggling, but didn’t know what else I could do. This is when a friend of mine suggested I try using essential oils. I was seriously skeptical at first…you want me to do what with those oils? So I did some research and everything checked out.

I have to be completely honest, I did not get hooked right away. Not because the oils didn’t work, they did, but because Will and I found out a couple of weeks later that we were moving cross country and I became completely consumed with our relocation. I stashed my Young Living stuff into a box, not to be seen again until arriving in FL.

As you can imagine once we got here, as with any move, life was chaotic. Both the girls and I were stressed and it showed. Specifically, the girls decided that sleep was highly overrated and that 7:30 bedtime Mom and Dad we’re trying to enforce wasn’t happenin’! I battled them for several weeks before my dear friend stepped in and said, how ‘bout them oils. Okay, she really doesn’t talk like a cowboy, but you get the picture. So, here’s how it went.

First 20 (or so) nights in FL without oils: Girls 20, Mom 0.

Night 21 in FL with oils (specifically lavender and peace and calming): Girls 20, Mom 1. Assuming this was a fluke I was still skeptical.

Night 22: Girls 20, Mom 2.

Nights 23-however long we’ve been here, um, let’s just say Mom’s winning again!

Goes without saying, I’m a believer. Now anytime something comes up in our house I check to see what oil I can use before heading to the medicine cabinet.

 

Here’s what we use regularly:

Peppermint for headaches.

Lavender and peace and calming on the little ones at bedtime.

 

 

Stress Away to de-stress (obviously) valor to calm anxiety. And my favorite one of all, THIEVES!!!! My kids still haven’t gotten sick this year. HAVE. NOT. GOTTEN. SICK. I know I’m going to jinx this if I keep talking about it, but I have to share because it really sucks when your kids are sick. I also diffuse a lot. Lemon and peppermint, thieves and purification, the list goes on and on.

Okay, time to wrap it up. This is my story of essential oils. Thank you for reading this ridiculously long post and I hope that this answers some questions for those of you who reached out!

Things Are Looking Up, People!

I've been feeling a little better the last couple days. On Tuesday I locked my keys in my car 20 minutes before I needed to leave to pick the girls up from school. Things are looking up, people, I didn't cry!  Luckily I left one of the sliding glass doors unlocked so I wasn't locked out of the house too. Once I got inside I knew that actually finding the spare key would take some sort of miracle because in spite of constant work on my house since we arrived in July, there are still a few boxes that aren't unpacked. Like the box that was my junk drawer and housed my spare key. I know it's in the garage somewhere, but if you saw my garage loaded with boxes (man, I miss basements) and could experience the stifling temperature, you would understand that I didn't have a chance. On a side not, ya know the smell of wet cardboard? Like when you've got a box you leave outside in the trash pile and it rains. That's what my garage smells like. All the boxes combined with 99%humidity makes the smell almost unbearable. Anyway, what could have been a major disaster, turned out just fine. Fortunately I got a couple of the mom's phone numbers earlier this year and one of them was able to pick me up to go get the kids.

It may have already occurred to you that not only were my keys locked in the car but so were the car seats. Awesome. I am a car seat Nazi. Last year my parents decided to take my kids on a joy ride of sorts without car seats and I lost it. Lost it. I am typically extremely even-keeled (or should we call that passive, hmm???). I've never been more upset with my parents and I let them have it. In an assertive way, but let 'em have it none the less. Fast forward 6 months and the girls are buckled up in the back seat sans car seats of some woman's car I've only just met. Sweet. All ends well with this story though, made it home just fine. And somehow, I was able to keep my cool in what only three days earlier would have brought me to the fetal position in a fit of tears. Like I said, things are looking up, people!

Orlando and Other Things

It's been a long time. Again. I'm noticing a pattern here. It seems that when my mind goes idle I seek some sort of outlet and pop up in blog land. I could spend days updating whomever it is that actually reads this (I literally don't think anyone does) but I think the short and sweet will have to do for now. I'm still a mom of twins and I'm still living in a suburban circus, but the zip code of said suburb has changed. I moved from Colorado to Florida in mid-July and until just a week ago everything was fine. But now I'm homesick. Like really, really homesick. I miss my friends, I miss my family, I miss the familiarity of home and I am so over being hot. OVER. IT. Humidity sucks and heat plus humidity is even worse. I've been brought to tears by the smallest things lately and can't seem to kick it.

It started a week ago today at the DMV and things have been downhill since. All I can say is that I called ahead to make sure I had everything I needed to get a FL drivers license and plates. I left there after three hours, crying and not having completed the mission. So terribly frustrating. I haven't been able to put myself through it again so I will drive on with those expired tags.

Husband has been out of town and/or working late a lot which is hard even when you are surrounded by a support system but painful when in a new city. I'm feeling disconnected from him too which seems to be compounding the desire to go home.

Then there's just the little day to day stuff that goes wrong. It goes wrong everyday, but when you're already feeling down it seems worse. Today for example I forgot to bring the girls' immunization records when I dropped them off at school which were due absolutely no later than last Thursday. It's Monday. But I didn't remember until I'd already driven to Target so it took me an extra 30 minutes in the car to get home and back to school so the girls didn't get the boot.

Here's another one, also today, my husband washed the blender last night, like actually took the whole thing apart and cleaned it. Great, right? Nope, not great. Had he put the circle rubber thingy back in before screwing the bottom on it would have been fine. Instead he left it out and the near full bottle of OJ I poured into the blender flooded onto the counters, cabinets and floors I finished cleaning 6 minutes earlier. I later found the rubber thingy in the garbage disposal which tops my list of good places to store little blender rubber thingies. Once I found it and was ready to move forward with my smoothie making venture, I was beaten down yet again when I realized the base was screwed on so tight I couldn't get the thing open anyway. Yup, that made me cry. What makes this story even funnier (funny now, NOT FUNNY in the moment, actually funny is the wrong word altogether because this still isn't funny) is that my husband has been bugging me about proper blender cleaning lately. He read in some reputable source, ya know, Maxim or something, that poor blender hygiene is a leading cause of ecoli growth putting we blender users at risk. Let me just tell you, I've been using a blender for a long time and typically I rinse it and put it away. No soap. No dismantling of parts. And. No. Ecoli. Naturally, I've politely resisted his suggestions for more laborious blender cleaning routines, but the discovery of his A+ efforts with the blender today prompted a not terribly nasty, but not terribly nice email either, clearly defending my less labor intense ways with the blender. To which he responded so sincerely apologetic that I felt bad again. And, yup, that made me cry too.

The final thing today that really only peeved me for the first hour, I guess I've gotten used to it now, is that the control panel for the pool we just spent an unexpected $7000 to repair...gotta love homeowners that lie about disclosures when selling a home...has been beeping nonstop for the last four hours. It's not like an alarm: beep, quiet, beep, quiet, beep, quiet, but rather a you've inadvertently held down a key on your keyboard and it starts beeping nonstop, just beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep, kind of beep. I've called the pool guys, googled it and have come up with absolutely nothing other than the fact that the error it's displaying means my hot tub is at risk for freezing temperatures. Given that I'm in FL and FL has proven to be hot as shit, I suspect that isn't the actual problem. I'm holed up in my room so it's barely audible now. Things are looking up, folks, things are looking up. Let's just hope tomorrow goes better, because crying daily, let alone multiple times per day is completely out of character for me and getting old. These tears have gotta stop!

2013: The Year of the Budget

At the risk of sounding shallow and, well, completely irresponsible, I'm coming out with it: Over the last few days I put together the first budget for our family ever.  This is a little pathetic as my husband and I have been married for four and a half years and our kids are almost four (no they're not bastards...I just got pregnant practically the day after we got married and they were born REALLY early) and we're just now getting this done. As I mentioned in my last blog, my husband is still with the same company, just accepted a new position. It was our hope that in spite of the pay cut his overall hours and stress would drop significantly. In reality, he gets paid half the money, works more and is more stressed. AWESOME!!!! That being said, it is what it is, and after multiple transfers from savings to checking last year it occurred to me we most definitely are spending more than is coming in. DUH!!!! Enter the budget.

I actually had a blast putting it together. Don't get me wrong, the end result ain't pretty, but I feel so much better knowing exactly what is coming in each month and exactly what is going out. I made this pretty little spread sheet in Excel and am now obsessed. We actually do a good job with the frivolous spending, but realized that there are a couple of areas that we can improve on. For one, Starbucks.

Let me just preface this by saying since having kids, Starbucks is my drug of choice. It's my crack. I go every single day (sometimes twice). "Hello, my name is Ann, and I'm addicted to chai." However, when you're spending nearly $300/month there, it's time for an intervention. I have to add that the $300 isn't just me, my husband goes every day too. And after hot chocolates here and there for the girls and breakfast for the four of us at least one day over the weekend, it adds up! So the REALISTIC (really important) goal is that I will only go once a day and I will no longer order food. Let's be honest, there's no way, unless of course I donated my kids to Salvation Army, that I could (translation: would want to) cut it out completely. This is doable. The other big ticket items are tuition and childcare while I'm in school.

Childcare alone is almost $2000/month. Ouch! It makes it hurt even more that I work for free. I'm currently a lowly intern with a monthly income of ZERO dollars. Double ouch! Anyway, as of now we pay for my tuition out of pocket but we're looking into the option of taking out a loan which if I'm not mistaken, is interest free until I graduate (or six months after). The goal would be to chip away a little bit while I'm still in school, even more over summers as I won't incur the same childcare costs, and pay off the balance quickly after graduation. We shall see, still need to look into it.

Another doozie is Comcast which seems to go up every few months. Time to give them a call and let them know I'm jumping ship unless...

The budget is definitely an eye opener. It feels so good to be on top of it though. And, if you haven't done yours yet (which I'm sure you all have as you're likely far less shallow and far more responsible than I) GET TO IT!!!! 

That Time of Year Again

It's that time of year again. I've been on winter break for six weeks now and the mind is idle. I'm bored. Which brings me back to my blog. I was just reading through old posts and really would like to keep up with this. Not expecting a miracle or anything, let's be real, I haven't written in a year, but, I would like to be a bit more present. That being said, there isn't a ton of time for catch up, but perhaps I should cover a few things that happened in the last 360 or so odd days since writing last.

Still in school and it's going well. I actually love it. I'm still struggling with the balance, but I'm close...closer than I've ever been and that feels good. Given that my winter breaks are so long my mind has a lot of time to wander though. I've been running many possibilities through my head and there are some things I need to take a look at. For one, school is frickin' expensive! In addition to tuition, day care expenses are nearly $2000/month. Plus there's books, parking, and the stupid toll road every time I go to campus (this actually is a life saver, not stupid at all, just costly). I need to figure out how we're going to keep swinging this for another two years. You would think I looked at this before starting, I guess I was a bit idealistic at the time!

I'm also feeling torn because I strive for balance between home life and school, but this snail's pace, part-time thing is killing me. During the academic year, all is well, but come winter break (two months) and summer vacation (over three) I can't help but feeling like it is a colossal waste of my time. I could knock out at least two classes during that five months. Sadly, my program doesn't offer any classes outside of the regular fall/spring semesters. I'm exploring taking classes online elsewhere and transferring them in so that I would be able to attend full time next year (minus the classes I transfer in) and knock it out in a year. Then I'd only get charged the onesie-twosie things one more time too. So annoying that I pay for collegiate athletics and construction fees over and over and over again. It adds up.

Could be an option to put off school next year and wait till the following year when the girls start kindergarten so that I could potentially pull off the full-time schedule without transferring any credit. Still don't know that that's plausible even with the girls in school...who knows?!!?!?!?

I've even been fantasizing about getting my real estate license reinstated. Sadly it's been expired for over three years now so I'd have to retake the exam. I've taken the classes and passed with no problem but that was five years ago. And, the woman at the Colorado Real Estate Commission kindly reminded me that those who attempt the exam without having taken the class recently only have a 20% pass rate. Odds aren't on my side.

Ultimately, I'll just keep plugging along, but holy hell, this is going to take me forever. I guess I'll just have to plan some fun things to do this summer to keep my mind off the fact that I have NOTHING going on.

In addition to school, the rest of my life is good. Here is a family photo taken in July. I know that's an eternity ago, but it's the most recent pic. with all of us so here you go: Ummm, okay, clearly been a while since blogging as I no longer know how to post pictures. Will add some next go 'round!

What else??? Will accepted a new job (within the same company) a little over a year ago and although the pay is MUCH less, he travels every other week and there is more stress...sounds like an awesome career move, right...we're now settled into the new routine. In a later post I'll talk more about the pay. I'm embarrassed to admit it, but I just did our first budget over the last couple of days. What an eye opener! Let's just say there's some room for improvement...we're talking $300/month at Starbucks (cringe)!

Girls are good too. Almost four (in March). Much more to update on them, but again, that will have to come in a later post.

Well, that's all for now. It's great to be back and here's to a wonderful 2013!

The Simple Life

When did my life become so rushed? Lately I've been longing for the simple life. I know that a farm in the country (another one of my fantasies) isn't realistic today but I would like to slow things down a bit. I want to do more for myself and avoid getting caught up in the fast paced lives of just about everyone around me. This is going to be tough. My husband is the type that can't hold still and usually this suits me just fine too. The first order of business in slowing things down a bit is sticking to my list.

"Hi, my name is Ann, and I'm an impulse shopaholic!"
"Hi, Ann!"

I'm the person who goes into Target for milk and leaves with the shopping cart overflowing with things I do not need. I go to Costco without a list! Anyone who shops at Costco knows that this can end poorly! While the immediate high is nice, who doesn't like grabbing things off the shelves on a whim, the additional stress of having all that extra stuff in my house isn't worth it anymore. So, I'm sticking to my list while at Target and I'm going to be writing a list before any outings to Costco. Not only will this be nice for the bank account, it will limit some of the junk that seems to come through my door each week.

So far so good. Did Target this morning, and would you believe, I left with only two items! I used to wonder why stores even had baskets. Now I know, they're for the list stickers just like myself! In all seriousness though, I do hope that my efforts to reduce the amount of stuff, thus reducing my stress will provide a sense of contentment. I want to be happy with what I already have. Why do we always want more?

A New Year-Sleep...I hope!

I'm hoping that 2012 is filled with many sleep filled nights for me! I'm embarrassed to admit that it's been over two months now that the girls have been waking up in the middle of the night. Naps have only been okay too, about an hour every day. I feel like a failure as a mom. How is it that I'm not able to figure this out? I've tried everything, cry it out, gates at their door and, yes, physical violence! Okay, nothing too serious...just a spank here and there, but even that's not working.

I had the pleasure of talking to a friend on Sunday who had similar problems with her son and had a ton of insight for me. The solution: splitting them up, using night lights as a cue for when it is/isn't okay to get out of bed, and continually walking them back to bed without saying anything other than, "it's not okay to get out of bed while the night light is still on." I have resisted separating them, well, their entire lives. I have a beautiful fantasy (hmmmm...noticing a lot of fantasizing going on lately) that my girls are in elementary school and have a very civilized discussion about wanting some privacy and space and we split them up then. Not at two because they are being total sh#$*ts and waking up four plus times per night. Oh well, time to let go of that. Is it weird that my fantasies revolve around Pottery Barn and my kids???

It's day three of the "new plan" at nap time. Batting about 500 here: day 1, success, day 2, fail, day three, one is awake and one is asleep. I haven't factored in any points for the fact that I am not sitting in their room in order for them to fall asleep and that they are both in their beds. I guess I could up that batting average a bit. Night time has been better too. We still have A LOT of room for improvement, but Ava, my sleep problem child, actually only woke up once last night, and only because she heard Sophie up. Sophie is a hot mess, sick as a dog, running a fever now for a week straight so I'm not surprised that she has been waking at night, last night at 2:45, 3:15, 5:00 and 6:00. I'm going to continue what I've been doing, as it does seem to be improving things, and once Sophie is back to her old self I'll be a little bit tougher on her. In theory, once the girls prove their ability to sleep through the night and get in a decent nap/quiet time I will be able to bring Ava back into the room with Sophie. Let's keep our fingers crossed!

I guess it goes without saying, I'm tired. Probably the primary reason I'm feeling so overwhelmed right now. I'm just trying to remember that this, too, shall pass.

A New Year-School

I've been inspired by Kelly and Lindsay to throw it all out there! At the risk of sounding like a total and complete whiner I think I'll break this post into several as not to kill the reader...assuming someone is reading this...hmmmmmm??? Anyway, it's been a long time, I know, I know. A lot is going on but probably of most significance is school. I started grad. school for social work in the fall. This has been a bitter-sweet experience. I am so happy to be doing something outside of the home and I learned so much last semester. Also have to throw in that I killed it! I got all A's. However, I feel like my success at school was at the expense of EVERYTHING else in my life. I had no time for friends, no time for myself, spent most nights and weekends writing papers and away from my husband and kids. The laundry went undone, the house was trashed and I don't know that it was worth it. It is daunting to think that this will go on for four years because of my part-time schedule. And yet, I know it's not possible to go full-time with the girls being as young as they are. Maybe I should rephrase that, I don't want to make the necessary sacrifices to go full-time with the girls being as young as they are.

I started second semester this week and the heels they were a draggin'! I'm dreading Research Methods (CRINGE!!!) and part 2 of Human Behavior in Social Environment isn't the least bit exciting either. Part 1 consumed the better part of my life last semester and I'm not looking forward to kissing it goodbye again this semester. I've been anxiety ridden the last couple of weeks trying to figure out what is best for me and what is best for my family. I'm pushing on, and do think that school is a good move for me. Even though bailing on school, getting a part-time job at Pottery Barn and carving out some personal time sounds heavenly. Side note: In spite of Pottery Barn's terrible customer service AND poor quality of products AND generally bad personal experiences with the company, I'm 100% addicted and can imagine nothing better than getting a significant discount (in my fantasy it's at least 50%) on all the glorious Pottery Barn garb that I can get my hands on! Okay, back to reality: it's Saturday night and I'm sitting at Starbucks taking a break from reading for school. Ughhh!

I'll get into this more in future posts, but my biggest fear about school is that I'm not certain I am capable of juggling it all. As I sit here, with over 100 pages to read for next week, Sophie is home with a fever of 101, Ava is running around like a bat outta hell because she hasn't had exercise in three days due to said fever. Will is packing because he'll be out of town next week and if history is the greatest predictor of the future, the girls will be up at least three times tonight, starting about midnight. How am I going to do this? At times I feel like I'm in it by myself and the weight of the world lies on my shoulders alone. I'm almost always overwhelmed. I am worried about everything all the time and not sure what is the right path for me. While I'm definitely not at peace with this decision, I'm pushing on. Here's to chaos, anxiety and stress...I guess.

Potty Trained!

I can officially say that the girls are potty trained! Well, for the most part anyway! No accidents in two days. They still wear pull ups for nap and bed but otherwise are potty going experts. So proud of them! Now the tricky part, leaving the house and getting back into our everyday activities.

We went to Target this morning...no accidents. We went to the park as well...no accidents. I think today and tomorrow I'm going to focus on quick outings so the girls can get used to being potty trained while outside of their comfort zone. Hope it goes well!

Such a relief! And the best part of it all is that I will never have to buy another box of diapers, that is until #3 comes along, but I'll cross that bridge when we get there.